Hi

Wish me luck.

Signed, Compy

i think i saw fiddlepat join the same server as me in rate my avatar once

He online

A, wow the wiki is very dead barely anyone goes on here sadly.

BigCheese#1518 fellow gg member see ya

Former Grocery Gang member here, okay i'm leaving the wiki, vih-bye

This is a dead wiki

(PREPARE TO LAUGH YOUR ASS OFF XD)

(WARNING: NSFW)

(DING DONG!)

Fiddlepat: (Opens door)

Amazook: "WELL FIDDLEPAT, I MADE IT, DESPITE YOUR DIRECTIONS."

Fiddlepat: "AH, BOSS, WELCOME, I HOPE YOU'RE PREPARED FOR AN UNFORGETTABLE LUNCHEON!"

Amazook: "YEAH..."

(CLUNK)

Fiddlepat: "BOSS, I HOPE YOU ARE READY FOR MOUTHWATERING HAMBURGERS!"

Amazook: "I THOUGHT WE WERE HAVING STEAMED CLAMS."

Fiddlepat: "NO, NO, I SAID STEAMED HAMS, THAT'S WHAT I CALL HAMBURGERS"

Amazook: "YOU CALL HAMBURGERS STEAMED HAMS?"

Fiddlepat: "YES, IT'S A REGIONAL DIALECT"

Amazook: "UH HUH, AND WHAT REGION?"

Fiddlepat: "UH... UPSTATE KNEW YOLK?"

Amazook: "REALLY? WELL I'M FROM YOUTIKA AND I'VE NEVER HEARD ANYONE USE THE PHRASE STEAMED HAMS."

Fiddlepat: "OH, NOT IN YOUTIKA, NO, IT'S AN ALLBANEE EXPRESSION."

Amazook: "I SEE." (Eats hamburger while Fiddlepat drinks) "YOU KNOW THESE HAMBURGERS ARE QUITE SIMILAR TO THE ONES THEY HAVE AT MYTHDONALDS"

Fiddlepat: "HO HO HO HO NO, PATENTED FIDDLE BURGERS, OLD FAMILY RECIPE!"

Amazook: "FOR STEAMED HAMS?"

Fiddlepat: "YES"

Amazook: "YES, AND YOU CALL THEM STEAMED HAMS DESPITE THE FACT THAT THEY ARE OBVIOUSLY GRILLED"

Fiddlepat: "Y... YOU KNOW THE... ONE THING I SHOULD..."

(Fiddlepat starts hearing Amazook angrily yelling his name echoing in his head)

Fiddlepat: D:> (Gets angry) >:(

(BOOM!)

Fiddlepat: (Is shattered) "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

(Cuts to Fiddlepat violently and brutally punching Amazook in the face until it's bruised)

Amazook: (Falls onto the table)

Fiddlepat: (Pulls down Amazook's pants, revealing his buttocks) "AAH, GOT YOU MY RUMPY DOPPELGANGER!"

Amazook: "GOOD LORD WHAT IS HAPPENING OVER THERE?!"

Fiddlepat: (Is holding a hamburger) "HO HO HO HO HO, DELIGHTFULLY DEVILISH FIDDLEPAT!" (Shoves the burger all the way into Amazook's butt, followed by him shoving more and more burgers into his butt until he pukes them all out)

Fiddlepat: (Smashes the silver platter onto his boss's head, heavily damaging it and damaging his box hood, before flipping him off and defecating onto him, followed by him pouring a gasoline trail all the way outside of his house) (Smokes a lit joint, before tossing it on the gasoline trail, igniting it and causes his house to combust)

LORD: "FIDDLEPAT, THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE! HELP! HELP!" (Screams in agony as the flames consume him)

Fiddlepat: (Is now wearing Deal With It glasses) (Flips off LORD) "NO LORD!"

THE END

(Cuts to a picture of Fiddlepat dabbing while wearing the Deal With It glasses)

Amazook: "WELL FIDDLEPAT, YOU ARE AN ODD FELLOW, BUT I MUST SAY, YOU STEAM A GOOD HAM!"

(Amazook and Fiddlepat exit the house through the front door)

LORD: “FIDDLEPAT, THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE!”

Fiddlepat: “NO LORD, IT’S JUST THE NORTHERN LIGHTS!”

Amazook: “WELL FIDDLEPAT, YOU ARE AN ODD FELLOW, BUT I MUST SAY, YOU STEAM A GOOD HAM.” (Walks off)

LORD: “HELP! HELP!”

Fiddlepat: 👍

(After Amazook leaves, Fiddlepat runs into his burning house)

Fiddlepat: (Gasps)

LORD: (Screams in agony as he burns alive)

Fiddlepat: “OH NO!”

(🚒)

(Sad music starts playing)

Fiddlepat: “NOOOOOOOOOO!”

(Cuts to Fiddlepat inside an interrogation room in Abandoned Facility)

(“YOU WORK AT A COMPANY WHILE YOU FEED ME FRIENDS!”)

Fiddlepat: “LORD... I’M IGNORING YOU LORD... I’M JUST ANNOYED, ANGRY... I’M A GROWN MAN NOW, AND I’M A GOOD WORKER!”

Mrflimflam: “?”

Guard: “Is he okay?”

(...)

Speedy2662: “ALBERT, LOOK! IT’S FIDDLEPAT!”

Fiddlepat: <:|

Mrflimflam: (Walks up to Fiddlepat) “Fiddlepat... what happened to LORD? Did he die?”

Fiddlepat: “HO HO HO NO!”

(Fades into Fiddlepat visiting LORD’s grave while shedding tears)

(“WHY IS THERE SMOKE COMING OUT OF YOUR OVEN FIDDLEPAT?”)

(“THAT ISN’T SMOKE, IT’S STEAM, STEAM FROM THE STEAMED CLAMS WE’RE HAVING, MMM, STEAMED CLAMS!”)

(“GOOD LORD WHAT IS HAPPENING IN THERE?!”)

(“FIDDLEPAT, THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE!”)

Fiddlepat: (Sniff) “I... I’M SO SORRY LORD...”

(Fades into Sebweigh walking past Fiddlepat)

Fiddlepat: “OH HEY SEBWEIGH, HOW ARE YOU?”

Sebweigh: “GOOD, HOW ARE YOU?”

Fiddlepat: “GOOD”

—-

Fiddlepat: (Holds out a friend to nothing) “HERE YOU GO LORD, EAT UP!”

(...)

Fiddlepat: “IT’S GOOD, ISN’T IT?”

—-

Fiddlepat: “NO, NO, I SAID STEAMED HAMS, THAT’S WHAT I CALL HAMBURGERS.”

(...)

Fiddlepat: “YES, IT’S A REGIONAL DIALECT”

(...)

Fiddlepat: “UH... UPSTATE KNEW YOLK?”

(...)

Fiddlepat: “HO HO HO HO NO, PATENTED FIDDLE BURGERS, OLD FAMILY RECIPE”

(...)

—-

(FIDDLEPAT? FIDDLEPAT! FIDDLEPAT? FIDDLEPAT!)

(Screams in agony)

Fiddlepat: (Jolts awake)

—-

(DING DONG!)

(...)

Amazook: (Opens the door and sees Fiddlepat with his face painted blue and gets shocked) “OH MY GOD...”

—-

“DELIGHTFULLY DEVILISH FIDDLEPAT!”

”AH, BOSS, WELCOME, I HOPE YOU’RE PREPARED FOR AN UNFORGETTABLE LUNCHEON!”

—-

“HERE YOU GO LORD, A FRIEND!”

”I KNOW YOU DO...”

“I’LL GIVE YOU SOME MORE FRIENDS...”

(...)

(NOM NOM NOM OM NOM)

Amazook: (Bangs on Fiddlepat's front door) "FIDDLEPAT! FIDDLEPAAAAAAT!"

Fiddlepat: (Opens the door)

Amazook: "WELL, FIDDLEPAT, YOUR DIRECTIONS ARE SHIT!"

Fiddlepat: "SHUT UP AMAZOOK!"

Amazook: (Enters the house) "AH?"

(Door opens)

(Burning)

Fiddlepat: D:

(Burning)

Fiddlepat: "OH LORD, MY ROAST IS RUINED! BUT WHAT IF, I WERE TO POOP ON FAST FOOD AND DISGUISE IT AS MY OWN COOKING? HO HO HO HO HO, DELIGHTFULLY DEVILISH FIDDLEPAT!" (Takes off apron and puts his leg over the window, attempting to leave)

Amazook: (Enters the kitchen) "FIDDLEPAAAAAAAAT!"

Fiddlepat: "AMAZOOK, I WAS JUST... UH... JUST STRETCHING MY CALVES ON THE-"

Amazook: "WHY IS IT WHEN I SEE YOUR OVEN AND SMOKE, I IMMEDIATELY THOUGHT OF THE WORD "FIDDLEPAT"?"

Fiddlepat: "IT'S GAS FROM YOUR ASS!"

Amazook: "AH? FIDDLEPAAAAAAAAAT!"

Fiddlepat: (Laughs) "OH LORD!" (Jumps out of the window and runs across the street to MythDonalds to purchase hamburgers)

Amazook: >:( ("FIDDLEPAT, YOU ARE IN VERY VERY BIG TROUBLE!") (Exits the kitchen)

Fiddlepat: "SUGARMAN, YOU'RE AN OLD PLUMB!" (Laughs)

Amazook: "AH?"

Fiddlepat: "I HOPE YOU'RE READY FOR STEAMED CLAMS!"

Amazook: "THEY ARE OBVIOUSLY HAMBURGERS!"

(SLAM!)

Fiddlepat: "NO, I SAID STEAMED HAMS! THAT'S WHAT I CALL HAMBURGERS!"

Amazook: "AH? YOU CALL HAMBURGERS STEAMED-"

Fiddlepat: "YES, IT'S A REGIONAL DIALECT-"

Amazook: "WHAT REGION?"

Fiddlepat: "UH... YOUTIKA!"

Amazook: "REALLY? WELL, I'M FROM YOUTIKA-"

Fiddlepat: "OH, NOT IN YOUTIKA, NO, IT'S AN ALLBANEE EXPRESSION."

Amazook: >:| (Eats a hamburger)

Fiddlepat: (Laughs)

Amazook: ?

Fiddlepat: "PATENTED POOP BURGERS!"

Amazook: (Gasps) "YOU SHIT ON THESE HAMBURGERS?"

Fiddlepat: "YES!" (Gets up) "EXCUSE ME FOR ONE SECOND." (Enters the kitchen)

Amazook: >:(

Fiddlepat: (Walks out and yawns) "WELL, THAT WAS WONDERFUL!"

Amazook: (Notices the fire in the swinging door) "GOOD LORD, WHAT IS HAPPENING IN THERE?!?!?!?!?!?!"

Fiddlepat: "AMAZOOK'S MOTHER!"

Amazook: "AH? I HAVE HAD IT! I HAVE HAD IT!"

(Cuts to an outside shot of Fiddlepat's house shaking, with a bunch of punching and kicking going on inside the house)

Fiddlepat: (Screams in pain) "MY BALLSACK IS RUINED!!!"

Amazook: (Groans in pain)

Fiddlepat: "OH LORD!'

(Afterwards...)

(Fiddlepat and Amazook exit the house, covered entirely in bruises and fist and foot marks)

LORD: "FIDDLEPAT, THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE!"

Fiddlepat: (Has a black eye and a bloody nose) "SHUT UP LORD!"

Amazook: (His box hood is damaged and has a black eye) "WELL FIDDLEPAT, YOU ARE A VERY VERY UGLY FELLOW, AND I MUST SAY, FUCK YOU!" (Walks off)

LORD: "HELP! HELP!"

Fiddlepat: (Flips off Amazook)

Amazook: (Walks off)

(REVENGE >:D)

(Deeply sorry if this becomes “Funny Aneurysm” Moment)

(DING DONG!)

(Door opens)

Amazook: “WELL FIDDLEPAT, I MADE IT, DESPITE YOUR DIRECTIONS”

Fiddlepat: “AH, BOSS, WELCOME, I HOPE YOU’RE PREPARED FOR AN UNFORGETTABLE LUNCHEON”

Amazook: “YEAH”

(CLUNK!)

(Door opens)

(💨)

Fiddlepat: :)

(🔥)

Fiddlepat: “HO HO HO HO, DELIGHTFULLY DEVILISH FIDDLEPAT-“

Amazook: (Enters the kitchen) “AH?”

Fiddlepat: “AMAZOOK, I WAS JUST... UH... JUST STRETCHING MY CALVES ON THE WINDOWSILL. ISOMETRIC EXERCISE. CARE TO JOIN ME?”

Amazook: “WHY IS THERE SMOKE COMING OUT OF YOUR OVEN FIDDLEPAT?”

Fiddlepat: “UH... OH! THAT ISN’T SMOKE, IT’S STEAM. STEAM FROM THE STEAMED CLAMS WE‘RE HAVING. MMM, STEAMED CLAMS.”

Amazook: (Exits the kitchen)

Fiddlepat: “PHEW” (Leaves the kitchen through the window and runs across the road to purchase hamburgers) “BOSS, I HOPE YOU ARE READY FOR MOUTHWATERING HAMBURGERS”

Amazook: “I THOUGHT WE WERE HAVING STEAMED CLAMS”

Fiddlepat: “NO, NO, I SAID STEAMED HAMS. THAT’S WHAT I CALL HAMBURGERS.”

Amazook: “YOU CALL HAMBURGERS STEAMED HAMS?”

Fiddlepat: “YES, IT’S A REGIONAL DIALECT.”

Amazook: “UH HUH, AND WHAT REGION?”

Fiddlepat: “UH, UPSTATE KNEW YOLK?”

Amazook: “REALLY? WELL, I’M FROM YOUTIKA AND I’VE NEVER HEARD ANYONE USE THE PHRASE STEAMED HAMS.”

Fiddlepat: “OH, NOT IN YOUTIKA, NO, IT’S AN ALLBANEE EXPRESSION.”

Amazook: “I SEE.” (Eats a hamburger) “YOU KNOW, THESE HAMBURGERS ARE QUITE SIMILAR TO THE ONES THEY HAVE AT MCDONAILS.”

Fiddlepat: “HO HO HO HO NOOOO, PATENTED FIDDLE BURGERS. OLD FAMILY RECIPE.”

Amazook: “FOR STEAMED HAMS?”

Fiddlepat: “YES.”

Amazook: “YES, AND YOU CALL THEM STEAMED HAMS DESPITE THE FACT THAT THEY ARE OBVIOUSLY GRILLED.”

Fiddlepat: “Y-YOU KNOW TH... ONE THING I SHOULD... EXCUSE ME FOR ONE SECOND.”

Amazook: “OF COURSE.”

(Fiddlepat leaves the table and opens the kitchen door, walking inside. As the door swings open, it is clear that the kitchen is on fire.)

Fiddlepat: (Laughs) (Walks out and yawns) “WELL, THAT WAS WONDERFUL, GOOD TIME WAS HAD BY ALL, I’M POOPED.”

Amazook: “YES, I SHOULD BE-“ (Notices the fire) ”GOOD LORD, WHAT IS HAPPENING IN THERE?!”

Fiddlepat: “AURORA BOREALIS?”

Amazook: “A... AURORA BOREALIS? AT THIS TIME OF YEAR! AT THIS TIME OF DAY? IN THIS PART OF THE COUNTRY? LOCALIZED ENTIRELY WITHIN YOUR KITCHEN?!?!?!?!?!”

Fiddlepat: “YES.”

Amazook: “MAY I SEE IT?”

Fiddlepats: “YES.”

(Cuts to Fiddlepat standing outside of his house)

Fiddlepat: :)

Amazook: (offscreen) “OH MY GOD, FIDDLEPAAAA-“

(💥)

(FIN)

(THIS IS WHAT HE GETS FOR LEAVING GROCERY GANG XD)

(Also, I’m deeply sorry if this becomes Harsher In Hindsight)

(DING DONG!)

(Door opens)

Amazook: (Is holding a poison bottle) “WELL FIDDLEPAT, I MADE IT, DESPITE YOUR DIRECTIONS”

Fiddlepat: “AH, BOSS, WELCOME, I HOPE YOU’RE PREPARED FOR AN UNFORGETTABLE LUNCHEON”

Amazook: “YEAH”

(CLUNK!)

(Door opens)

(💨)

Fiddlepat: D:

(🔥)

Fiddlepat: “OH LORD, MY ROAST IS RUINED! BUT WHAT IF...” (Cuts to Amazook pouring the poison in Fiddlepat’s wine glass) (Cut back) “I WERE TO PURCHASE FAST FOOD AND DISGUISE IT AS MY OWN COOKING? HO HO HO HO, DELIGHTFULLY DEVILISH FIDDLEPAT.” (Takes off apron and opens the window, as he puts his leg over the windowsill, attempting to leave)

Amazook: (Enters the kitchen) “AH?”

🎵Fiddlepat is in trouble tonight!

Amazook’s gone crazy!🎵

Amazook: “FIDDLEPAAAAAT!”

Fiddlepat: “AMAZOOK, I WAS JUST... UH... JUST STRETCHING MY CALVES ON THE WINDOWSILL. ISOMETRIC EXERCISE. CARE TO JOIN ME?”

Amazook: “WHY IS THERE SMOKE COMING OUT OF YOUR OVEN FIDDLEPAT?”

Fiddlepat: “UH... OH! THAT ISN’T SMOKE, IT’S STEAM. STEAM FROM THE STEAMED CLAMS WE‘RE HAVING. MMM, STEAMED CLAMS.”

Amazook: (Exits the kitchen)

Fiddlepat: “PHEW” (Leaves the kitchen through the window and runs across the road to purchase hamburgers) “BOSS, I HOPE YOU ARE READY FOR MOUTHWATERING HAMBURGERS”

Amazook: “I THOUGHT WE WERE HAVING STEAMED CLAMS”

Fiddlepat: “NO, NO, I SAID STEAMED HAMS. THAT’S WHAT I CALL HAMBURGERS.”

Amazook: “YOU CALL HAMBURGERS STEAMED HAMS?”

Fiddlepat: “YES, IT’S A REGIONAL DIALECT.”

Amazook: “UH HUH, AND WHAT REGION?”

Fiddlepat: “UH, UPSTATE KNEW YOLK?”

Amazook: “REALLY? WELL, I’M FROM YOUTIKA AND I’VE NEVER HEARD ANYONE USE THE PHRASE STEAMED HAMS.”

Fiddlepat: “OH, NOT IN YOUTIKA, NO, IT’S AN ALLBANEE EXPRESSION.”

Amazook: “I SEE.” (Eats a hamburger)

Fiddlepat: (Drinks) (Gasps) (Starts coughing and gasping for air) “OH LORD!” (Screams and gurgles) (Falls to the floor, where he struggles for life, before finally dropping dead)

(...)

Amazook: (Looks back, before walking off)

(You steamed your last ham, Fiddlepat)